No Weigh May!

 

No Weigh May Challenge! (Because that scale is a lying little bitch anyway!)

AKA: "Voetsek, Cravings!" – Cake and Wine Can Wait

Listen here, my china — it’s time to stop with the "just one more biscuit" excuses and show your cravings who’s boss. This isn’t a diet, it’s a full-on braai for your willpower, and guess what? You’re the braai master now.

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The Rules (Or How to Survive 31 Days Without Melting Like a Choc Wedge in the Sun)

1. Eat Like a Legend

Meat is life. Steak, wors, chicken, fish — whatever’s lekker.

Eggs? Yes, bru. Fry ‘em, scramble ‘em, chuck ‘em in a pot.

Veg? Fine... but don’t turn into a rabbit. Max two types per meal.

Pro tip: If you’re hardcore, smash some liver or gizzards too. Proper power food.

2. Drink Up, Buttercup

Water is your bestie. No Coke, no fancy cooldrinks.

Coffee and tea are cool — but no sugar, my bru.

Rooibos? Shot, ouma would be proud.

3. Move That Boodie

Sweat 5 times a week for 60 minutes. Walk, gym, dance around your lounge — just move, bru!

Minimum 6500 steps a day. Fake it if you must — jog on the spot at Pick n Pay.

4. Get Clued Up

Learn about Banting, Keto, Carnivore... whatever keeps you away from bread and pies.

Follow some lekker pages like Banting 7 Day Meal Plans or Ketovations.

Knowledge = power = six-pack (eventually).

5. No Weigh May (Because That Scale Lies Like a Politician)

Weigh yourself and take a pic on Day 1.

Then NO peeking until Day 31. Tighten that moer grip, you got this!

6. Meal Prep Like a Tannie on a Mission

Plan your meals like your life depends on it.

Steak and eggs? Sorted. Mince curry? Lekker.

Need ideas? Check out fortheloveofbanting.blogspot.com — lifesaver!

7. No Dop, No Problem

No booze for 31 days. None. Zero. Not even "just one glass" vibes.

Your liver’s gonna throw a jol when this is over.

8. Sugar? Not Today, Satan!

No koeksisters, no rusks, no "but it’s gluten-free" kak.

This ain’t the Woolies snack aisle, bru.

9. Sweeteners? Also Nah, China

Avoid them if you can. Your taste buds need to reboot — like Eskom flipping the switch on your sweet tooth.

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Cravings? Tell Them to Voetsek!

Cravings are like that one ou at the braai who won’t shut up about politics — just ignore them.

Drink water. Chew biltong. Go for a walk. Drop and do 20 push-ups.

Pro tip: Emotional eating doesn’t work — vetkoek isn’t therapy. Phone a mate, scream into a pillow, write a dramatic journal entry — just don't eat your feelings.

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Final Boss Level: Day 31

When you cross the finish line, you’ll feel sharper than a brand-new okapi knife.

When you finally weigh in? You’re gonn

a be ready to bok-bok-skiet, my bru!

Ready to vasbyt? Let’s do this thing!